Spoken Word Poetry: Facing The Unknown/Back to Square One

Hi everyone! I haven’t written in a while because I have been very busy with work, ironing out the beginnings of writing a book (see more here), and such as that, I’m back and have another poem I plan to add. This one’s mostly about going through some personal struggles and questioning what God has for me, but knowing I can trust Him, even though doing so can be- and often is- difficult to the human mind. At least, I know that has been my experience and it is easy to give into the temptation to think God doesn’t know what He is doing when our lives aren’t working out as we hope. That, for some reason, got me thinking this evening as I was considering my life as it has passed so far. After all, though I love God, love my family,  love my friends, love my church community, find my job rewarding and am glad for my career path, have hobbies I enjoy, etc., I still have my questions about what the future holds for me.

As such, I’ve had a lot of questions about myself as a person and what my future will hold. Thus, I was inspired to write again, especially as today is World Poetry Day! Thanks to Nicole Czarnecki at The Nicole Factor .  I appreciate the notice!

Without further ado, then, here is the poem I mentioned and I will also have more details on the manuscript for the book I am authoring if anyone is interested!

(P.S. Please pardon the formatting. Everything I have tried to fix it has failed for some reason! I will do my best to fix it and ask pardon!)

Facing the Unknown/Back to Square One

I have days I admit I can mundane and all the same like when

It’s six or seven o’ clock in the morning again

And I wake up wondering why I am here and what is my purpose?

I love what I do, which makes my work worth the doing, I say!

But, like anyone else, I wonder if where I am now is where I am called to stay

Or worse, was I meant to be somewhere else to start and I went my own way

Instead of seeking the God Who made me with all my heart and ordained all my days?

What if, instead, I am where I am meant to be and missing the bigger picture,

But get bogged down in the details of the everyday until that hurts?

Maybe there’s something in what I am doing that I am simply missing

And I just have to keep working, waiting, and praying concerning what I’ve been given.

I know all things will work for my good in the end, but I still have my questions!

For example, I believe my work is significant, but  wonder, “Is all this worth it?

Am I living my everyday as I am meant to live, giving my everything I have

Working for my bosses as for the Lord, the Great I Am, that is?”

I confess I am as human as anyone else and sometimes feel like mundanity

Has been the result of my existence, awaiting the fulfillment of dreams of majesty.

Then I reflect on my God, my family, my friends, and the freedom of my country

And remember I am blessed, no matter what this life holds for me.

Of course, the cycle continues on to some weekends, however I find myself awakened,

Whether by sunlight on my face, alarm clocks, or puppy kisses.

Usually, I find myself waking early almost every morning then

And start the day praying, though battling life’s uncertainties again.

Then comes the inevitable: will I accomplish everything I had planned?

Will I find time out from housecleaning, bills to pay, and such as that?

Hopefully, I find myself thinking, I’ll spend quiet, focused time with God,

Take some time to share with my loved ones and snuggle up often with my pups.

That is, I find myself asking “Will life ever be less mundane than it seems at present

Even though I know my days are filled with good things and I have been blessed?”

After all, I doubt I’m alone in feeling that my everyday has moments of stagnancy

And wondering whether I am living my life well for the One greater than me.

I have my doubts sometimes about where I have been led and

Whether the life I have lived is making an impact, to be honest.

Right now, I admit, I am perplexed at best about how to manage.

At worst, I’m sometimes surprised I haven’t said, “All right, then,”

And found myself questioning all that I’ve come to believe in!

Very well, I know that the Gospel truth of my God is what it is

And the One Who is Faithful will never break His promises.

Even when I face the unknown, then, and find that my progress

Has put me back on square one again, still He is with me, no matter what’s next.

Whatever this life holds, in conclusion, however it changes

Be it life holds new relationships, income, travel destinations,

Career changes, new studies, greater wisdom and revelations,

Whether the mundane stays the same or becomes majestic,

Perhaps I am the problem in my life and need a change in perspective.

Something about realizing that the unknown is not mine to know, though,

Is, I confess, refreshing, although I admit often to a fear of the unknown.

Perhaps I am stuck in this cycle because I need to know more how to listen

To the voice of my God and to keep believing that all He says, He will do yet!

I know that facing the unknown and being on square one sometimes is not the end;

Rather, every time I find myself here is an endless second chance to start afresh

And live better for the rest of my life, for eternal impact and significance.

To God be the glory in all things, to Him forever and ever, then!

In the Name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen!

 

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Back to Writing…and A Risk…..

Hi everyone! I know it has been a while since I’ve written anything, as life had become busy, stressful, and exhausting as a result of life circumstances coming together enough for me to freak out and resign myself to waiting for the right time. Finally, I see a lull in the activity around me that is enough to have made me think about taking a risk.
The risk, to be specific, is publishing a book of the poetry and other writings I have made over the years. From the time I was twelve, perhaps earlier than that, I’ve been passionate about writing. I’ve also been passionate about missions work and noticed that most of my writing has concerned the Gospel directly. What is more, many, many loved ones have  told me I should publish some of my work, and I don’t see why not. At least, I’m willing to take the risk because I have considered it for a long time and I see now as being as good a time as any to do so. Finally, on the heels of my sister publishing two books a few years ago, which she continues to do today, came my decision to give it a shot.

tall-stack-of-books-clipart-book-clip-art

(I threw this in here to give you an idea of Nicki’s work so far, which inspired me!)

If anyone is interested in checking out her work:

1) Here is Nicki’s blog: http://www.thenicolefactor.blogspot.com

2) This is the first of the aforementioned books:

https://www.amazon.com/Finding-Jewishness-Discovering-Yetziratiyut-Creativity/dp/3639794281

(Somehow the image didn’t come up, so I am encouraging y’all to check out the link instead.)

3) This is the second of the two books in question:

4) For any other work you might like: Here is her Author Central page.

https://www.amazon.com/Nicole-Czarnecki/e/B01E6GA2C4/ref=dp_byline_cont_pop_ebooks_1

The final step in the decision-making process had to do with encouragement from a friend at church- many, actually- who pushed me to publish what I have written!
Therefore, to those of you who have followed my blog, YT channel, and such so far, thank you! Your support and continued interest in my work has motivated me considerably as well.

Above all, if Jesus isn’t in it, I’m done. I will walk away from everything willingly if ever there should come a time that I am more consumed with fame and fortune than reaching people for Christ, with money and fame as tools to do so. I have no doubt that God can use anything and everything in this world to spread His Gospel. After all, He made everything that exists and I see no reason not to continue to glorify His Name by the writing I’m doing. At least, I think so and I figure the risk is worth a shot!

I will also resume doing as I had promised previously and would appreciate suggestions, etc., to start again. Thanks be to God, y’all have been incredible motivators and I am grateful to know you, no matter how often or little we talk or otherwise communicate.

In that vein, I have one more question for the more experienced bloggers, authors, and such of the world: For a first-time/future published author like me, what advice do you have that helped you succeed in taking the risk and seeing it through? What kept you going, knowing the risk would be huge, but made doing so worth it? I would appreciate any constructive feedback that you would have to offer if you are so inclined. Thank you very much!

In His Name, may this be done, if this is His will.

God Bless,

Michelle

Update/Au Moment…

Hello, everyone! I’m sorry I’ve been away and ask pardon. Work, life, and other personal concerns have taken my time, mostly. I am, however, doing more writing (poetry, song lyrics, etc.), and will post some of them each day this week. Please pardon my absence and I promise to be more consistent in the future!

Bonjour, mes amis! Je suis désolée que j’étais absente ici. Mon travail, ma vie personnelle, et des autres affaires personnelles m’occupe au moment. Néanmoins, j’écris plus des poèmes, des lyriques pour des chansons, et cetera. Je les publierai cette semaine. Pardonnez-moi, s’il vous plait, et je promis que je créerai mes postes avec plus de régularité!

God Bless/Dieu vous bénisse,
Michelle
Die

Spoken Word Poetry: Part 7 (?): You Matter To Me

Hi everyone!

Once again, I find my writing comes back in the strangest of places….well, okay, church isn’t that strange, but my email inbox is! Oddly, courtesy of Peter Hollens, I found writing flowing like a river, again. I have yet to finish my previous work, which you saw if you read my previous post. If not, the link is below and I think you’ll see why I believe it is unfinished. (Then again, a true artist’s work is never really done, is it?)

https://mademoisellemichelle1990.wordpress.com/2017/04/30/when-inspiration-calls/

That said, finding inspiration in an email  and on Facebook (thanks to Peter and Evynne Hollens and Gary Turk, in fact) were odd occurrences at first, but not so now. Therefore, I’m just going to write and put it out there. All comments are welcome provided they are spam-free and appropriate for all eyes to read. Thanks and God Bless!

You Matter To Me

You matter to me, they tell me, and I tell them the same,

But what happens when I say it and my actions don’t change?/

What happens when someone asks for much-needed space

Or reaches out for connection and I regard each wish with a “nay?”/

What happens when I’ve isolated myself, caring for myself alone

And someday, I find that I truly end up on my own?/

When “You matter to me” becomes “You’re important only as I propose”

Is it any wonder that we soon think ourselves sinless and throw the first stone?

 

Let me, then, be the first to say I am sorry for the ways I’ve been

Thinking myself the victim of most predicaments I’m in./

No one deserves much of what I’ve done and I ask your forgiveness, please;

Yes, though I am human and need grace, I admit irresponsibility./

 

Friend, family member, past partner, coworker, or whomever you may be;

Please know that I mean what I say and I hope you accept my apology.

All I ask is one chance to show that I have changed my ways by God’s saving grace,

And I cannot guarantee that I’ll be perfect, but will do, by His grace, the best I can./

After all, He provided me love and salvation, so who am I to exclude any person?

And now, as I conclude, I feel a change taking place; yes, I’m finally set free!

I understand if you are skeptical, but I ask for you to take a chance on me/

And believe me when I say I will take a chance on you, too.

For I believe God meant it when He said, “Come to Me, all of you

Who are weary, tired, anxious, hopeless, and seeking life anew.”

Friends, perhaps I am alone, but I date to ask: why not start anew?

What would happen if we were honest and lived out the Golden Rule?/

To do so won’t be easy, this I grant for sure,

But to do so is worth more than anything we all dare to hope could provide more./

I say this because God has once again made clear that I matter to Him,

So, reminded of this, I feel there is something to be said of it.

 

Finally, just so you know, before you go, you matter to me

And I pray you found yourself encouraged whether you believe./

Thank you, dear readers, for taking the time to read the words I typed,

And I pray you know you matter as you slumber, or perhaps arise./

May God give you strength and courage to conquer the days to which you wake

And know that you are loved, no matter what happens each day you will face./

I pray that as I conclude this poem tonight that God gives you strength

To live out each day aware that you are worth it all, no matter what living this life takes.
Thanks again and God Bless,

Michelle

 

 

When Inspiration Calls…..

Write. Just write. It doesn’t have to perfect, I realize. Actually, I find that the bulk of my inspiration comes from being in church and in community with loved ones, especially fellow believers, outside of church. I have to give my pastor a lot of credit, actually, as something he said in church today really resonated with me.

Namely, take a look at Exodus 12 and tell me who you think the angel of death was. Some say an archangel, some believe there was another angel assigned to do this task, some say Jesus (“the Angel of the Lord,” as He is so often called in the Old Testament.).The answer surprised me, as I was of one of the other schools of thought that, well, wasn’t what God meant to show us. Considering that the Angel of Death passed over houses marked by lambs’ and goats’ blood and that pointed to the sacrifice Christ made for us well after the Exodus, I think that is a neon sign pointing to Who the Angel was.

That also got me thinking and, thus, I am writing again!

So far, I have what is written here:

The Angel of Death could have taken my life that night

He passed over my house and saw the doorframes./

But He saw the blood and He spared me from the might

That could have meant the end of His love and my days./

But in His grace, I lived to see my shame taken away

And He chose to die when the punishment was mine!/

How can it be that He chose me to live freely for His sake?

Why should I have been spared from the fate to die?

 

Chorus:

But He is here and in His death saved me

He is working in my life even when I cannot see./

God will stay faithful even in my unbelief-

Yes, even when I doubt, or I don’t believe  . . ./

He walks with me, He walks with me.

Child, are you wandering in the deserts of your past

Questioning what you have not instead of seeing what you have?

There is grace, there is mercy, it is free, just come and ask

Without cost and with an open heart, will your chains break at last!
(Chorus)

You are free in Him, loved, wanted, chosen, forgiven

He will never leave or forsake you in His promise./

Oh, come to the fountains, all who are thirsty!

Drink from the well of life and prepare to live free!

(Chorus 2x)

Something like that. If you have any comments, questions, etc., please do share them.

By the way, I’m also linking y’all to the sermon here.

https://livestream.com/mosaicchristianchurch/mosaiclive/videos/155294217

Let me know what you think! All comments are welcome provided they are clean, etc.

God Bless,

Michelle

What Happens When…..?

Hi everyone!

Sorry I’ve been away for so long! To be honest, as much as I want to write, my life has been incredibly busy and I find that, at least over the past month, there have been enough work and life-related changes that I find my writing to be sporadic at best and nonexistent at worst. I know I have posted about this before and I have the feeling this may not be the last time I will do so. What’s more, I find I have had trouble organizing my ideas because I have so many about which to write that I don’t know where to start.

As you can imagine, since God made me a creative person who enjoys writing, art, languages, history, music, etc., this is frustrating for me. I imagine I am not alone, so that leads me to the ultimate questions I have here.

Fellow creative people of WordPress, what happens when you find you’re having trouble finding time or inspiration to write, make something (jewelry, food, paintings, poems, name it), or do something else creative for God’s glory, the good of others, and that of yourself as He allows ? Additionally, what helps you to refresh your creative mind and get organized during your slumps? Any advice is much appreciated. Thanks!

God Bless,
Michelle
Michelle

Happy New Year! Well, Almost….

Hi friends!

As we go into this New Year, how do you think your year went and why? What was the best part? What was the worst? (Yes, more than one of both is acceptable to write here, for those wondering.) Also, what are your resolutions for 2017? Mine are as follows, as I have the feeling some may ask:

1) Get closer to God by reading Scripture, journaling, and sharing in community with fellow believers every day.

2) Make more time for family and friends however that may be, including my furbabies.

3) Save more of my money. I have a set amount going into my savings account with every paycheck and resolve not to touch it save for emergencies or other unexpected expenses.

4) Exercise daily, even if that is just some light stretching or a one-hour walk with my mom, my sister, the pups, or some combination of the specified groupings.

5) Be more efficient at work and have no fear about seeking feedback especially.

6) If I can, do a random act of kindness for someone daily. If not, do so as much as possible this coming year.

7) Write more poetry and songs, also taking the time to repair my guitar and violin in between all of the writing!

Finally, above all, how may I pray for you and yours as we enter the New Year? God Bless!

God Bless,

Michelle